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You're Not For Everyone

Updated: Jun 7, 2023

As I think back on high school and college, there were groups or “clicks”, and it was either obvious, informed or you stayed with the same group/click from middle school. For example, the popular groups, science groups, the jocks, different gangs, etc. Within these groups, they had, let's say a label associated with them. And as I think back, I don’t think I was associated with any group, but I do remember a particular spot I would chill at for lunch, and it felt like a blended group. In college, I had no time for that, but I guess the business and management group as it related to my major.

These phases in life can put you in a category, which is associated with a pattern and trajectory of how your life should be, and as I think of this, The Breakfast Club movie is a true depiction of just that. If none of these students connected during detention, they would have continued to assume this or that of each other as it pertains to groups. Other movies that come to mind that relate to this are Clueless and School Daze. If you have time, watch them.

My point is that in learning of these groups, not based on what has been said or heard, you decide to actually take the time to experience the different walks of life. You may learn something completely different about yourself and feel what you have been feeling all along; and in so doing, you decide, not based on where you live, how you look or social status for example, you realize what might “fit”, is not your “click”.

Embrace what you feel is right for you. Yes, high school and college, there is a learning curve that might be harder, based on several factors as mentioned above. To think that the quarterback is more connected to the science group than the athletes might make your head tilt. College is somewhat the same, but you have more freedom and exposure, especially if you live on campus or go to a college in another state or country. The mindset or pattern of thought is still there but is less rigid or confined, and you feel some sense of freedom to choose.

Now, when you get out into the working world, you are also in a group and labeled based on your profession. So, ask yourself, What has really changed? Well, you have changed. All of these experiences have led you to this point, based on your observation of the self (your being) and those around you. You get to decide, and trust, You’re Not For Everyone.

Look around and then face your true north, that is your being. What is it telling you? I know that I am not for everyone, and I am truly comfortable in that space. Finding your tribe requires love of self, patience, exploration, and observation. Feed what feels right for you, your soul. Yes, you might have heard in your ear for over a decade, your appearance says this about you, which is fine, but your true nature says something else. Take the mask off, and ask yourself, Who Am I? The outside world is no match to what lives inside. Yes, it was hidden for a period, but you have the power to break free and see what comes to the surface.

Explore what has always been there, no matter how hard it may be. This is not easy, because that might mean breaking free from family, friends or colleagues, but ask yourself, What Is More Important? Doing what feels right within your soul or the status quo?

Poem by Ayanna Njeri Welsh

Let your true north be your guide

Do not hide what is inside

Take that ride, it may be bumpy for a while

But it is worth your time

You’re not for everyone will make you smile

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